Better ways to say “your clothes are inappropriate”
Why it can fall flat
“your clothes are inappropriate”
It judges the person instead of naming the issue, so it can feel like an attack on their taste, body or background. What you likely want is to name a specific dress expectation and ask for a change, calmly and privately.
Say this instead
- 01
I'd like to chat about our dress code, as a few of your recent outfits haven't quite matched it. Do you have ten minutes this afternoon?
Someone you manage · Chat
Works as a private opener: it names the topic, avoids judging the person and invites a conversation rather than a verdict.
- 02
Hi Harper, could we have a quick word tomorrow morning about what to wear on client days? I'd like to explain what we expect. Thanks, Courtney
Someone you manage · SMS
Good when you need to set up a private talk without putting the details in writing; the focus is the expectation, not the person.
- 03
Can I mention something awkward? Today's outfit looks more casual than our dress code allows, and I'd rather say it quietly than see it become a bigger issue.
Coworker · Chat
Suits a peer you get along with, since it admits the awkwardness and keeps the message between the two of you.
- 04
Hi, a reminder that our restaurant asks for smart casual dress tonight. Shorts and flip-flops aren't permitted, so please plan accordingly. Thank you.
Customer · SMS
Use before a booking or visit: it states the rule plainly and gives the customer time to adjust.
- 05
To confirm what we discussed: on office days we expect smart-casual clothing, with no sportswear or ripped items. The last few outfits fell short of that, so please adjust from Monday. Tell me if anything is unclear.
Someone you manage · Email
Use as a written follow-up after a conversation so the expectation and the start date are clear to both of you.
- 06
Someone on my team has been wearing outfits that don't meet our dress policy, and I'd like your view on how to raise it.
Boss · Email
Use when you want backing or guidance before you speak to the person, especially if the policy is open to interpretation.
Examples
Hi Kayla, I'd like to talk about what we wear at work, starting with footwear. On office days we ask for closed shoes, and the flip-flops you've worn this week don't meet that. Could you switch from Monday? I'm glad to talk it through if anything is unclear. Best wishes, Avery
Hi Trevor, quick one before the 3 pm client call: the hoodie is more casual than we usually go for with clients. Could you swap it for a shirt or a jacket before we join?
What to avoid
- Don't use words like “inappropriate”, “unprofessional” or “revealing” about the person; describe the item and say what you need instead.
- Don't raise it in front of others or in a group channel; keep it one-to-one.
- Don't comment on someone's body, religion, culture or gender; stick to an expectation that applies to everyone.
- Don't compare them with what other colleagues wear.
- If there's no written dress code, describe the specific expectation instead of citing a policy.