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Saying no and setting boundaries

Better ways to say “we are not interested”

Why it can fall flat

“we are not interested”

The word “not” stings here because it shuts the door flatly, with no warmth, and can make the other person's effort feel like it counted for nothing. A clear, courteous no that closes the matter does the job better.

Say this instead

  1. 01

    Thank you for thinking of me. I'm not looking to move at the moment, so I'll pass on this role. I appreciate you getting in touch.

    Recruiter / HR · Email

    Fits a first approach from a recruiter, since it is warm, gives a short reason and leaves little room for follow-up.

  2. 02

    Thanks for the proposal. We've reviewed it and won't be taking it forward, as it doesn't fit what we need right now.

    Client · Email

    Use it after a formal pitch or scope suggestion, because it is clear, respectful and does not invite negotiation.

  3. 03

    Thanks for the invite, but I'm going to sit this one out so I can stay focused on my current work.

    Coworker · Chat

    Good for optional projects or groups, since it declines without criticizing the idea.

  4. 04

    Thanks for considering us for this. Having looked at it, I don't think it's the right use of the team's time now, so I'd suggest we decline.

    Boss · Email

    Lets you refuse an opportunity while giving a reason your manager can weigh and agree with.

  5. 05

    Thanks for the suggestion, but we won't be pursuing this. We're keeping our focus on our current offering. Appreciate you thinking of us.

    Customer · SMS

    Short enough for text, it suits a customer's request or an offer you can't take on.

  6. 06

    Thanks for pitching this. I'm not going to take it forward this quarter, but I appreciate you bringing it to me.

    Someone you manage · Chat

    Gives a direct no to someone you manage while acknowledging the effort they put in.

  7. 07

    Thanks, but I'm not interested in this role. Please don't contact me about similar roles.

    Recruiter / HR · SMS

    Helpful when a recruiter keeps messaging, as it stays civil but firmly ends the thread.

  8. 08

    Appreciate the offer. It's not something we want to pursue, so let's leave it there and carry on with the current scope.

    Client · Chat

    Suits an informal chat when a client adds an extra idea and you want to close it quickly.

Examples

Email

Hi Fatima, Thank you for sending over the proposal for the new reporting tool. We've looked at it carefully and have decided not to go ahead, as it doesn't fit our needs right now. I appreciate the time you put into it. Best regards, Alfie

Chat

Thanks for the invite to the planning group, Lesley. I'm going to pass on this one so I can stay focused on the launch work.

What to avoid

  • Don't say maybe later or another time if you mean no, because it invites repeated follow-ups.
  • Long excuses backfire, since each reason gives the other person something to argue with or solve.
  • Sarcasm or one-word replies like No can read as rude.
  • Leaving the message unanswered often leads to more chasing.
  • Offering to keep their details on file is only fair if you really will.

Rewrite your message

Add a few words about your situation for a better result.

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